Right now you are probably saying “Feel your feelings, WTF?”
I know it is a fairly new concept to me so I get it. I understand that you may not know what that means so I’m here to educate you.
First off I want to say that MOST of us are too damn busy to take the time to FEEL our feelings. We sort of go through life on autopilot without a thought. We just do. We don’t know what else to do and we don’t give it a second thought.
Another thing is we are from a young age told NOT feel. “Don’t cry, you’ll be okay”- says your mom after you fall and scrape your knee on the pavement…
In relationships of all kinds we are told to not feel a certain way, or we shouldn’t feel like that. Shut the fuck up! (thats what plays in my head). I get angry when I am told to not feel something. How do you even do that?- This is me now
For awhile I was able to just shut off but that was because I was afraid of what someone might say in response to my feelings or reactions to my feelings. So I did just that, I shut off. This caused so much pain and anxiety inside me that I became so quiet and this “shutting off of feelings” followed me to every relationship. I’m not just talking intimate relationships either, I’m talking with the people in my everyday life.
I would also turn to food for comfort, but that’s a whole other subject….
I was scared.
I FEEL my feelings now
I talk things out even when it’s hard- but it still does take me awhile to get it out- I’m working on that
How can you get to this point?
Allow yourself to give in to whatever you are feeling. If you feel the urge to eat, drink, or do anything else, STOP. Take it in and go with the feeling. Maybe you need to scream, cry, throw something (as long as it’s not towards someone) DO IT. Pushing feelings aside will not let you work through the issue. Sometimes we need to just give in and we feel better.
Another way is to be aware, be mindful whatever you want to call it do it. As long as you are fully aware of what is happening you will be that much more successful in this.
2 Simple ways is what I am going to leave you with, nothing difficult or scary. Try it